joancrawford: Good GODS! Last night I caught Christina

Hollywood Royalty..... (

joancrawford) wrote,
@ 2001-08-21 15:47:00

Current mood:

embarrassed

Good GODS! Last night I caught Christina in bed...WITH ANOTHER WOMAN!
I think her name was Vera...All I know is that she attends Chadwick academy with my daughter...Who could have known, my daughter, CHRISTINA CRAWFORD, WAS A LESBIAN?!
Oh, well. I always did think she was rather ~~beastly~~ manly. Not to mention hairy.
Anyways.
Tonight I am having photogrophers come over to take pictures of my wonderful estate, my olympic swimming pool, and my extensive french wardrobe.
Let's just hope that Tina can control her rumbling vulva...I do hope we won't have a repeat incident of her thrusting her loins against the camera tripods...*sigh*...

(Post a new comment)

	marilyn__monroe 2001-08-21 01:11 pm UTC (link)
	Oh dear! That's rather.. piggish of her, don't you think Ms. Crawford? If I can be of any help, just let me know. Much love, * Marilyn Monroe (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Re: joancrawford 2001-08-21 06:56 pm UTC (link)
	Hmmm...I shall keep that in mind, my dear. Love, J.C. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	kai_ta_loipa 2001-08-21 01:48 pm UTC (link)
	RUMBLING VULVA! that's great! you should be a POET, joan!!! (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Re: joancrawford 2001-08-21 06:54 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you, darling! It was actually a phrase coined by my SLUT of a daughter... TO ALL MY DEVOTED FANS, I LOVE YOU ALL!!! Love, J.C. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	laughingsal 2001-08-21 04:22 pm UTC (link)
	There are other uses for wire hangers. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Re: joancrawford 2001-08-21 06:43 pm UTC (link)
	Your mother should have used one to prevent one of Hollywood's biggest disasters...GET MY DRIFT? (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	kai_ta_loipa 2001-08-21 10:35 pm UTC (link)
	hahahaahaa... YOU ROCK, JOAN! (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	Re: joancrawford 2001-08-22 01:06 pm UTC (link)
	I owe it all to the support that comes from YOU...ALL OF YOU! You're the ones who make me shine brighter than any other star at MGM! TO ALL MY WONDERFUL FANS, I LOVE YOU ALL!!! Love, J.C. (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

Biggest star? I beg to differ

norma_shearer
2001-08-23 06:54 am UTC (link)

May I remind you that I am Queen of MGM, not you! I played the greatest queen in history, Miss Marie Antoinette, while you played another of your poor struggling shopgirls that made you BOX OFFICE POISON. All I can say is that breeding tells, you Texas whore. By the way, Irving and I are having a lavish dinner party at our oceanside estate and inviting all the VIPs in Hollywood. You, of course, are not invited, unless you would like to serve.

As Always,
Norma

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	Re: Biggest star? I beg to differ joancrawford 2001-08-23 06:05 pm UTC (link)
	Well, I do declare! The only thing about you that would fall under the category of "Queen" would either be the Drag Queens that imitate your looks (and incidentally, pull it off better), Or your sick sexual fetishes that got you the parts you play. I wouldn't attend such a weak and pathetic social gathering unless someone popped pills in my pepsi! (Reply to this) (Parent)

	bravo! ms_dietrich 2001-08-22 11:34 am UTC (link)
	i couldnt have said it better myself joan... she herself cant control her rumbling vulva. i saw her just the other day infact giving a blumpkin to the jeweler behind the counter at tiffany's. how very sad that ms davis is. love, marlene (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	laughingsal 2001-08-22 12:49 pm UTC (link)
	You are an overrated showgirl, Ms. Dietrich. You should have stuck to doing strip-teases in German bordellos. (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	poor old girl. ms_dietrich 2001-08-23 07:24 am UTC (link)
	yes yes yes darling. perhaps a showgirl, but one who can act!! which is more than you can boast cock gobbler! and look at these legs would you!!!!! love, marlene (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	laughingsal 2001-08-23 04:53 pm UTC (link)
	Has anyone written songs about YOUR eyes? (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	Re: joancrawford 2001-08-23 05:45 pm UTC (link)
	I wouldn't be too proud of that song, Bette dear...cringes (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	laughingsal 2001-08-24 05:31 pm UTC (link)
	You have a point there, J.C. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	Re: poor old girl. joancrawford 2001-08-23 05:46 pm UTC (link)
	Oh, Marlene...your wit is only surpassed by your intelligence and skill! Love, J.C. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	Re: bravo! joancrawford 2001-08-22 01:03 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you, Ms. Dietrich! I couldn't have done it without the support of all my WONderful fans! I LOVE YOU ALL! Love, J.C. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	laughingsal 2001-08-23 04:54 pm UTC (link)
	I'm sure THE ACADEMY would beg to differ. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	I can cure lesbianism. robby 2001-08-22 06:38 am UTC (link)
	When I'm done with her she'll be a Homer-sexual! (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Re: I can cure lesbianism. joancrawford 2001-08-22 01:04 pm UTC (link)
	Oooooohh, hehheee! Oh, Robby! You did always know how to make me smile after a bad day on the set... Love, J.C. (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	You Divine Diva! robby 2001-08-22 01:15 pm UTC (link)
	I live to amuse you. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	secretime 2001-08-23 11:18 am UTC (link)
	Joan, your beauty and talent are unparalleled by the tired old roaches that seem to have infested Hollywood lately. You make me question my own existence. Bottoms up! (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Re: joancrawford 2001-08-23 05:46 pm UTC (link)
	Yes, honey! Bottles and buns! Love, J.C. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	cslater 2001-09-03 02:07 pm UTC (link)
	It's slightly off the topic, but Joan, I need to tell you something . A few weeks ago, your daughter Tina and I had our own little rendezvous and and I was just able to see into her closet from my er..position. Anyway, horrible as it was, I'm absolutely sure the closet was stocked full of nothing but WIRE hangers... (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Re: joancrawford 2001-09-04 10:38 am UTC (link)
	Yes, a few weeks ago. I have cleaned it out and beaten her severely since. There shall be NO more reminders of my days in the back of a laundromat... (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	karmakanic 2001-09-05 02:34 am UTC (link)
	Joan, you are a TRUE star. The brightest star ever to grace the streets of Hollywood. But Joan, I need some fresh material to go on... you haven't posted anything new in what seems an eternity. I feel like I'm caught in a summer of perpetual re-runs... Please Joan, relate to us what's going on in your glamour saturated life. Enquiring minds want to know! (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	Re: joancrawford 2001-09-05 10:53 am UTC (link)
	Yes, I realize it has been a while, and I apologize to all of my adoring fans, (I LOVE YOU ALL!) but I have just been so busy with the shooting of "Ice Follies of 1939". I shall make an appearance shortly, I assure you. TO ALL MY WONDERFUL FANS, I LOVE YOU ALL!!! Love, J.C. (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	my dear joan... italianprincess 2001-09-15 10:30 am UTC (link)
	how HAVE you been? I haven't talked with you in ages. we simply must do lunch again. we need to catch up on some things. that ass-wipe Mad_Cow challenged myself, Penny, and Tina to a 6 person tag team match. When it goes down, you have to be there. Two Queens are ALWAYS better than one :) ~QOTR~ (Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

	Re: my dear joan... joancrawford 2001-09-15 01:13 pm UTC (link)
	I agree wholeheartedly...HER AND HER COHORTS SHALL FEEL THE WRATH OF OUR DIVINE PUNISHMENT! P.S. I would LOVE to have lunch with you again sometime! Have your people call my people! Love, J.C. (Reply to this) (Parent)

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